It started small.
Too small, honestly.
At 9:06am, a guy walked into Fern’s Fine Flower Shop, grabbed his usual, stepped up to the counter…
…and paused.
“Wasn’t this $20.00 yesterday?”
Fern didn’t look up from her coffee.
“It’s $20.03 today.”
Long pause.
“…why?”
Fern took a sip.
“Inflation.”
By 9:22am, it was a thing.
Not a big thing.
Just… a noticeable thing.
- $10 became $10.03
- $25 became $25.03
- Someone whispered, “everything’s +3 now”
By 9:41am, the first napkin math appeared.
Outside, two guys stood hunched over a receipt like it was a crime scene.
“Okay but if everything’s three cents… why is my total rounded to $20.05?”
They stared at each other.
Silence.
One slow realization.
“…we just paid five.”
By 10:03am, the town had split into factions.
Group 1:
“It’s only three cents. Relax.”
Group 2:
“It’s not three cents.”
At 10:18am, Nugs arrived.
He didn’t even go inside.
He just stood outside the shop, arms crossed, watching people walk in… and walk out slightly confused.
“This is layered,” he said to no one.
By 10:32am, someone brought a calculator.
Not a phone.
A full calculator.
Buttons. Sound. Commitment.
“She’s rounding UP.”
A small crowd formed.
Inside, Fern remained exactly the same.
Calm. Quiet. Coffee steady.
A customer stepped up.
“Are you… rounding everything to the nearest nickel?”
Fern smiled slightly.
“The system does what the system does.”
Outside, Nugs had escalated.
He flipped over a milk crate, stood on it, and addressed the crowd:
“THIS ISN’T ABOUT THREE CENTS.”
People nodded.
Deeply.
By 11:11am, things got heated.
- Someone demanded exact change
- Someone else paid entirely in nickels out of principle
- One guy tried to pay $20.03 with a $20 bill and vibes
At 11:47am, the Mayor showed up.
He listened.
Nodded.
Then said:
“Technically… rounding is allowed.”
The crowd turned slowly.
“BUT—” he added quickly, “this feels… aggressive.”
At 12:06pm, the truth started to settle in.
Not loudly.
Not officially.
Just… quietly spreading.
Every transaction…
Every single one…
Was landing on the next nickel.
$20.03 → $20.05
$15.03 → $15.05
$8.03 → $8.05
Every time.
Outside, Nugs leaned in close to someone and whispered:
“…she’s making two cents per transaction.”
The guy shook his head.
“No… five.”
They both went silent.
Inside, a customer finally asked the question:
“Fern… are you doing this on purpose?”
Fern looked up.
Calm.
Unbothered.
“I run a business.”
At 1:02pm, the line disappeared.
Not dramatically.
Just… slower.
More cautious.
People thinking.
But not leaving.
Because despite everything…
They were still buying.
Fern watched the register close on another perfectly rounded total.
Took a sip of coffee.
And very quietly…
smiled.